I never actually saw this. Looks nice. (Photo courtesy of Tawny Clark-permission pending))
Every traveller has a story, most will have more than one. If you’re lucky, after some time, you will have so many that you lose track of them and can’t remember what you told to who. Should you find yourself in that last category, it is also a safe bet that a few of those stories are not all tales of sunshine and unicorn farts.
Anyone who has wondered a long road can also tell you that often times the best stories come from the things that don’t go right. This road warrior has more than a couple of those, and just racked up a few more in the Philippines.
Sometimes, nothing at all goes to plan. Every last detail will be blown to hell and and even the best traveler is left completely at the mercy of the winds. When you are like me, and plan as little as possible, you know you’re in deep whenever this happens. The lone thing you can do is adapt and find the best of what is left in front of you. Thankfully, the Philippines is never short of stimuli. Considering our history together, this was a very good thing.
The past seventeen years of my life were spent dreaming and determined. At the ripe old age of eight I had the Philippines dangled before me and then quickly yanked away. At that time in my life I was surrounded by Filipinas and in love with everything about them. Nothing sounded more wonderful than to know more. Nothing sounded worse than to wait.
Year after year I hoped I would get my chance. I never did. However, like she has so many times before, Lady Korea was ready to help.
Now my 5-ish days in country were full of countless stories, some of success, most of failure. It was a trying stay, one that tested every ounce of my considerable experience. It was at times lonely and discouraging. However, in the end, I regret nothing and am proud to have finally made it. I’ll spare all the details, I will simply say I learned a lot about the country, and life. Here are a few of those lessons:
10. The rum is good and cheap. The libation of choice on the islands, it actually costs less than the coke it is so often mixed with. Go for at least a double. You’ll find yourself happy and your wallet won’t lose much weight. Did I mention it’s really good?
9. Like everywhere else, if you’re smart, you’ll eat on the street. Try everything. Start with the eggs.
8. If you have a pulse, you will befriend a hooker, most likely a transvestite. They’re really not bad friends to have, just be weary anytime you open your wallet, it might also be Pandora’s Box.
-Foot note: I still hate sexual tourism. Thanks for the reminder.
7. There is no wiser philosopher than a 400 pound Filipino. Once they take you under their wing, there’s no way out. Sometimes literally.
6. Ferries live by their own rules. Anything they say can and will change. Prepare for this. I didn’t.
5. Millipedes can be very big, and are not afraid of shower drains.
4. Manila is the definition of sensory overload.
3. Unless you’re rolling in money, you will never know a full night’s sleep. Your chances are only diminished if your accommodations are a plywood box.
2. Solo travel is fine, but your company can make all the difference. No one is invincible, sometimes we all need backup.
1a. I still got it. The universe tossed every monkey wrench she had at me. Though worse for wear after five days, I still came out on top and saw some incredible things
1b. I know I said 10 things, but this one simply cannot be left out. In life, not everyone can be trusted, that’s a given, but I still vote some of the finest people on this planet hail from the Philippines. We are all better off having known anyone who can call themselves Filipino.
If you ever get the chance, swing by the Philippines. It will be eventful.
Ryan
